Welcome to the Season 7 finale; in this episode, G-Rex and Dirty Skittles reflect on an unforgettable season filled with powerful stories, valuable lessons, and laughs. We're celebrating the incredible guests who joined us and the community we've built around mental health awareness and support.
Episode Highlights:- Regent opened our season by stressing the importance of having "fierce conversations"âwith others and ourselves. His insights on facing difficult truths set the tone for meaningful discussions this season.
- Laurie shared her experience balancing self-care with motherhood and offered practical advice on creating mental health safety plans for herself and her daughter.
- Andrea provided crucial tips for staying mentally strong while job hunting after a layoff, giving hope and guidance to those navigating similar challenges.
- Jeff Rasley inspired us with his journey from lawyer to mountain climber, showing how stepping outside your comfort zone can lead to newfound joy and purpose.
- Zach turned the challenges of the pandemic into a thriving goat milk soap business, teaching us about resilience, gratitude, and the importance of embracing our inner child.
- Jeff shared the emotional experience of advocating for his NICU baby during COVID-19, highlighting the importance of solid communication and mental endurance.
- Kate explored how creativity can be a powerful tool for self-care, offering insights into the therapeutic benefits of art.
- Dr. mOe Anderson brought her expertise as a dentist and mental health advocate, helping us understand and conquer deep-seated fears.
- Mary K transformed her anxiety into a successful writing career, reminding us that it's never too late to find purpose and fulfillment in life.
As we wrap up Season 7, we're excited to announce that our new merch shop is officially open! Whether you need something safe for work or want to sport our classic podcast logo, you can find it at Goesoninourheads.shop or Customized Girl (volume pricing available).
We also want to thank our sponsor, X-Sense Smoke Alarms! Keep your home safe with these advanced alarms that connect directly to your phone. Don't miss out on the 20% discount with code XSENSESD. Click here to secure your home today!
Call to Action:If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health, please reach out to the crisis hotline in your area. It's OK not to be OKâjust make sure you're talking to someone.
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Audio Editing by: NJz Audio
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Hey there, listeners. Welcome to Shit That Goes On In Our Heads,
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the podcast where we normalize conversations around mental health.
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That's right. I'm Dirty Skittles, and alongside my amazing co-host,
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you, Rex, we are here to share stories and tips from our incredible guests.
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Each episode, we deep dive into struggles and triumphs of mental health,
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offering practical advice and heartfelt support.
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Because no one should feel alone in their journey. Join us as we break the stigma
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and build a community of understanding and compassion.
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Tune in and let's start talking about the shit that goes on in our heads.
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What a season, G-Rex. Oh my God, what a great season.
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And you know what? We got to start it off with our amazing friend, Regent.
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Yes, and I'm going to fangirl again because for those that are listening to that episode,
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regent was somebody who i always looked
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at like oh my gosh who is this amazing force
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of a person so to be able to talk to him
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in such a candid way was i fangirled for like 10-15 minutes i know you did and
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i love this conversation about those fierce conversations and you know having
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those conversations and not holding that stuff in but actually like speaking
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to the person to get that message out.
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And since we recorded that episode, I've actually done that twice.
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And I'm going to tell you, it was absolutely freeing.
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That's awesome, dude. That's awesome. I'm so happy to hear that for you.
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There was another part of that that I took away from listening to his story
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and him sharing his experiences with us was that sometimes those fierce conversations
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that you need to have are with yourself.
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Being able to listen to who you are in that moment, what's true to you,
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what is bothering you, how to deal with it, and if it includes having a conversation
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with somebody else, how to best prepare yourself for that.
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Yeah, I actually used it after I did some journaling and I had journaled about
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something that was really bothering me and something I really needed to get off my chest.
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And when I finally built up the courage to have that
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conversation it actually turned out better than
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i what i thought it was going to be because you know we have all that
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negative self-talk we're trying to build up
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the courage to have that fierce conversation but it was absolutely freeing to
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have that conversation and that and have it be honest and have it come from
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a place of god you know what we just need to get this out in the open yeah it's
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amazing how freeing that can feel so i'm happy you got to have that,
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And he was such a gracious guest and just funny, a little bit of irreverent,
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not as irreverent as you and I are. But, you know, we try.
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We love you, Jen. And then we had the amazing Lori and the fact that she was
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able to figure out that she needed to take care of herself before she could take care of her kid.
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Right, right. Right. And I think that it's hard to take note of that sometimes
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because we're either wrapped up too much into ourselves or we are completely
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invested into the wrong thing.
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So for her to be able to take the time, take care of herself so that she can
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show up properly for her daughter, I was so happy to hear that.
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It was amazing. it was amazing and the fact
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that she came up with that like self-care like checklist
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of like of who to call right like
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yeah the safety plan the safety plan like you know
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knowing who to call when you when you're out of sorts or like mentally or physically
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like have that that list and just put it on your refrigerator like if I'm in
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crisis who can who's going to be my first call yes and and developing not only
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one just for yourself but for your family too like I remember saying in that episode,
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like the one thing that I would, that would live on after we had that conversation
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was that I would make a safety plan.
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And I specifically wanted to have one for my child so that when they're older,
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they know that they don't always have to come to mom or dad.
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If they don't feel comfortable coming to mom or dad, there are other resources
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out there. And I think that to me is really important to like.
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Take on and implement in our life. And I love the resources that she has put
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together for other moms who have teens that are going through mental issues, right?
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And she had that big symposium and really cares deeply about the community and
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because she's out there living it every day.
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Yeah, huge. That was amazing.
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And such an amazing soul. She comments
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on every single one of our posts on Instagram. I love that about her.
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She reaches out after we send out our newsletters, letting us know that we're on the right path.
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And that's important to us too, is to make sure that we're delivering good content
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for everybody so that you at least get something out of it. Yeah, yeah, I know.
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That's what's important, right? We get to have these conversations and live
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in that moment and selfishly ask the questions we want to ask,
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but I'm happy to know that there are people that are listening and that we
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are providing them real resources so yeah that
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is huge and then we had Andrea and
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her episode couldn't come at a better time you know yes we we both had friends
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there were 22 of that 2200 of them that got all laid off at the same time and
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her episode about looking for a job after you've been laid off and And,
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you know, taking care of yourself mentally and her tips and tricks were so invaluable.
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Yeah. And like the message of sometimes it's going to take hundreds of resumes
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that you're submitting into a job application before you find the right one.
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That's that is ultimately the best fit for you.
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And making it fun, right? Not making it into a job, but making it fun.
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And also stepping away from the job search so that you can take care of yourself
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and your mental health. And...
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You know, just be good to yourself because it is such a hard thing to get laid off.
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I know what I know. So when I got laid off like over 20 years ago, it was it broke my heart.
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Yeah. But, you know, we have such a great community of old co-workers that we
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they are all working together to help each other out.
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And I think that that episode from Andrea really helped them to realize what
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an amazing community that we do have. Yeah.
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That's the thing too. Like I remember hearing her episode back again,
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and I don't think I caught it in the moment, but afterwards listening to it again,
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the idea that just because you're no longer working together,
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that relationship with those people doesn't have to go away.
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Like the fact that she still has conversations with co-workers that were not
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co-workers now, but they used
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to be co-workers and now they're friends and like having that community,
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just like you said, I think is what will help you get through when it is really
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tough to know that you're not alone and you have other people there that are
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cheering you on and like reposting, you know,
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that you're open for work and like just this whole community of like-minded
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individuals is important to remember during the tough times.
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And I love the fact too that she went and volunteered at the zoo,
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you know and got to
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act you know like she actually and who's happy
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and like pretended like she actually knew what she was talking about and
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you know you could hear the joy in her voice when
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she talked about that and you know finally landing the job
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that she'd wanted for a really long time and i you know my only hope is that
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you know for our friends and co-workers that had lost their job that they they
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really took the time to listen to that episode and you know got something out
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of it so that it's not so hard to find another job.
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Yeah, I agree. And then we had Jeff.
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Oh, he was so much fun. He was the lawyer turned mountain climber.
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I know, but I liked his episode because it in some way,
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and I feel like this is going to sound bad, but I liked the idea of getting
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outside of your comfort zone and taking risks, like maybe doing riskier type
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of things within reason, obviously,
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but just rediscovering certain aspects of who you are apart from like a big
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job that you had for X amount of years, right?
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Like stepping outside of that comfort zone, being a little risky,
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doing something a little crazy, maybe.
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But finding so much joy in doing that too, and giving back to the community
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and all the stuff he does for Nepal and the organizations that he's on the board at in Indiana.
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Like just a super nice guy and an incredible writer and funny.
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Like you wouldn't think that he was funny like when we first started recording,
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but he's got some really good stories and just a good soul, like good for the soul.
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Like he made me feel good after we were done recording and I just really loved talking to him.
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Amazing, amazing. amazing and then we
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had zach and zach earned all
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the negativity in his life yeah just something really
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good like they make goat goat milk soap that
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was probably some of the best goat milk soap i've ever used yeah
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and they and they started that during such a tough time in
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the world during the pandemic and working
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with his mom and kind of almost like
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rediscovering what is work during a pandemic because during
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that time nobody knew what to do like we were all sort of just like
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what happens now so to be able to to redefine
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almost who he was and and what his
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purpose was and to be happier for it and for
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sure and and then also you know finding out that his wife was pregnant and then
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having to deal with the whole NICU during COVID and like he just approaches
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just each day with a sense of happiness and being grateful for everything that
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he has and, you know, working hard,
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but also playing, you know, and we talked a little bit about,
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you know, finding your inner child and how he finds that every day,
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just by playing with his son and how that that's really important is that we,
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you know, we remind ourselves that that our inner child needs to come out and play every now and then.
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I, I've been really good about that this summer. My inner child has come out
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more lately than it probably has in about 10 years.
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But yeah, I like to play. Okay. I like to laugh.
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I need a bit of reverent, but I like to make other people laugh because,
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you know, laughter is really good for your mental health.
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If you can find like even 15 minutes during the day, it will,
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it helps transcend the rest of the day.
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It just really sets the tone. And that's really how this podcast started.
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It was, was some conversations that Dirty Seedles and I would have a lot that
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didn't make it onto the podcast because they don't really need to be out in
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the world, but they did make us laugh.
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And it was a huge healer for me right so sharing our stories laughing and I'm
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so glad that you know Zach came on and he was laughing and he he got to tell
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us what it felt like to be a kid again,
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yeah I love that and I guess to some degree hearing you say like you're playing
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again I think that's probably I'm starting to do that a little bit more I think like with my
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crow feeders, because I will have pet crows that bring me trinkets.
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Only as long as you don't get attacked by the owl. Right, right,
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right, right. That's a story for another podcast, though.
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I can't help it that Harry Potter decided to come and visit you, so, you know.
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That owl has definitely claimed my backyard, but we need to somehow get him
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out, or it could be her, I don't know.
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But I need the crows and the ravens to come in and the owl to vacate.
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Yeah. If anybody has any ideas. Yeah, if you have ways to eradicate the owl,
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please let us know. In a nice way.
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In a nice way. Not in a mean way. Just needs to be relocated.
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But then we had Jeff. And Jeff was talking about his son that was born during
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COVID and really advocating for his son, you know, during the time because,
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you know, they're babies and they can't advocate for themselves.
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And, you know, what a mental strain that put on him and his wife,
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because during COVID, like, you could only have one person in the hospital all the time.
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And, you know, it was a tough time anyway, but then you add COVID and having
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your son and NICU at the time made it even worse.
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Yeah. And like him having to learn how to advocate for his child,
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But also, one of my takeaways from that was just how well he learned to communicate
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with a significant other, too, because during that tough time,
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you have to be able to be there for each other and tag team and be essentially
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a team to advocate for your child.
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And I remember hearing that and thinking like, wow, that's great that they were
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able to communicate so well, because it's not always the easiest thing.
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Right and they you know they actually have
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a really good facebook group too that you know helps parents
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you know just deal with real life stuff that comes
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up for parents and also like the fact
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that he they set up time so that they both have
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alone time away from the kids right so that they
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can recharge because i don't have any kids but
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i can only imagine that the amount of time and energy that
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goes into raising your kids but also
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needing a little bit of time for yourself yeah because
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it's easy to get lost in something you love so much so you
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need to remember who you are and take care of yourself first oh
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that's a good lesson do you think you can remember that can you
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write that down i want you to go back and listen to this episode again maybe
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just frame that little that little you know what that kind of is a perfect segue
00:14:57
into kate because i remember talking with kate and i don't exactly know what
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it was that was said that made.
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Me think of it but I for
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a while wasn't quite sure why I
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liked doing this hobby that I do which is essentially making t-shirts
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and cups and stuff like that but the imagery on it is where I really my passion
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stems from is like creating a fun image and putting it on something and when
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we talked to Kate her discussing different forms of therapy and art I remember being like oh oh,
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that makes sense because I will listen to music and then produce whatever image
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the song shows up in my head.
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However, it shows up in my head. I produce that as the art for the thing that I'm making.
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And then I realized, oh, that's probably why I love it so much because it's
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a form of taking care of myself.
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And like, that's my selfish little hobby where I get to do that. And it's therapy for me.
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And it's funny because the podcast is actually therapy for me, right?
00:16:01
I could just write off to my little retirement and be fine,
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but I get so much joy out of this and not just the recording part of it,
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but the writing part of it, the learning part of it, and just really engaging with people.
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We have more friends now than I ever thought I would have. And they're from
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all different walks of life. They're men, they're women.
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And I'm seeing different parts of myself and it makes me smile.
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Like, yes, I had to go through some really bad shit to get here, but I'm so much happier.
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Like I'm the happiest I've been in 20 years and this is my form of creating.
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And, you know, people laugh, but like even doing the show notes or doing the
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newsletter, I get to write.
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And over the summer, I've done a ton of writing.
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I'm about, I'm more than halfway through
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my book i spent the summer writing that
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middle chapter and really getting those thoughts down
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on paper is huge and you know i i have
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a goal the goal is to have it completed by december 25th
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of 2024 and i'm three quarters of the way there and so that's what kate reminded
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me of it's like being creative like getting that shit out of your head onto
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a piece of paper or coloring or being out in nature or laughing. Being free.
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All those things that make you feel like a kid again.
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That, you know, that's kind of the theme of the summer is be a kid again. Yeah, definitely.
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We also got to talk to Dr. Mo. Yeah. And for anybody who hasn't heard it,
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I would encourage you to listen to her TED Talk.
00:17:45
Because in that TED Talk, I remember, and also when we spoke with her,
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one thing that I've been pretty, I feel, and I don't know if every parent does
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this, but, and I guess you don't even necessarily have to be a parent.
00:17:58
But when something really important in your life is going to happen,
00:18:01
putting thought into how exactly you will address certain situations that may come up.
00:18:06
And for me being a parent, I remember thinking I have some really fucking crazy
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fears that I don't want my child to inherit from me because I know they're crazy.
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Like my fear of whales, for example. Like why? why
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but talking to dr mo i
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remember learning from our conversation that
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that is essentially how some fears are.
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Passed down to children is by how their parents behave or
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you know their family members and it's like a learned behavior and
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it's it's serious because it doesn't
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have to be like you don't have to do that no and
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you know the the other thing i got out of that conversation is
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you know i have a huge fear of the dentist right because
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that's what she does but you know
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what i i conquered that fear i found
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a really good dentist nearby i was able to get the
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chip fixed on my tooth i liked
00:19:02
him so much i actually gave him a hug and thanked him because i
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really do have a deathly i am deathly.
00:19:08
Afraid of dennis just because of things that have happened in the
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past but I liked him so much that I'm going
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back to get a cleaning like you know and
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even five years ago I wouldn't have done that because I
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really disliked that but she said those
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those are normal fears so you know what I kind of felt
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validated in the way that that I feel but I
00:19:28
also knew that I wanted to get my my tooth fixed because there's
00:19:32
other things coming up you know later on this year for
00:19:35
the podcast where I actually am going to need to smile and I
00:19:38
don't want people to see I didn't want people to see the chip
00:19:41
in my tooth like the gap i don't care about but
00:19:44
the chip on my tooth was very noticeable so i
00:19:47
wanted to say say thank you to dr mo because she she
00:19:51
helped me conquer those fears and for me that's huge yeah you're overcoming
00:19:56
them yeah you know and at 61 you know yeah i'm i'm still afraid of some stuff
00:20:02
okay yeah dentist i'm a big baby i totally get it you know, but they are...
00:20:12
Built off of a foundation of like other things that happened
00:20:15
you know even 10 years ago with jenna
00:20:18
so i'm i'm okay with that and you know what i'm happy i conquered a fear yeah
00:20:23
and then we had mary k and man she really inspired me this woman went from you
00:20:32
know being an empty nester and And having tons of anxiety around that,
00:20:37
writing these incredible books.
00:20:39
I got her series and I started reading it. Like I couldn't even put the book
00:20:44
down. Like I'm not really an avid reader.
00:20:47
I'm not like my wife. She'll read a book in a day. But I finished the first book in like two days.
00:20:53
I couldn't put it down. That's awesome. Yeah, she really relearned who she was, right? Right.
00:20:59
And like embraced things that
00:21:01
she enjoyed doing and made her passion a reality and and not just one.
00:21:07
It's like like there's a couple of these. Right. Isn't it a trilogy?
00:21:10
Right. A trilogy. So, I mean, she's doing what she loves and she's so happy
00:21:15
and just not being afraid to share that with the world is really cool.
00:21:19
Yeah, and, you know, she was able to find something that worked for her anxiety
00:21:24
and gave us a lot of good tips and tricks, you know, to pass on to our listeners and, you know...
00:21:32
Having anxiety sucks. I didn't think I had anxiety until I got a little older.
00:21:40
And now I have to write shit down.
00:21:42
Otherwise, I, you know, fuck, look, squirrel. You know.
00:21:49
Literally. But I think, you know, I just want to thank all our guests.
00:21:53
You know, you were all so vulnerable and so beautiful to have on the podcast.
00:21:58
And you left us with really good life lessons.
00:22:03
Yeah. Thank you so much for everybody who took the time to meet with us,
00:22:06
put up with us and our weird questions.
00:22:11
Hey, here's a one with weird questions. And our potty mouths.
00:22:14
I did not have, I've been better with the potty mouth lately.
00:22:18
Dude. A little. I don't know if I have. I feel like, I feel like maybe,
00:22:23
but not really. I don't know.
00:22:25
Who knows? The listeners will let us know. know the listeners will let us know
00:22:29
when we've totally gone off off the hook but you know i i we can't i couldn't
00:22:34
do the podcast without dirty skittles you know we we still talk every day,
00:22:39
you know before work just to kind of set the tone for the
00:22:42
day and you know make each other laugh and that's
00:22:45
how i found find out about the crazy owl story and
00:22:48
you know how how little nuggets doing and
00:22:52
you know keeping each other you know in a safe spot yeah you know and i i hope
00:22:58
that you all have friends out there that you can do that too on a daily basis
00:23:02
because it helps me what are you looking forward to next season wow so many
00:23:08
things are happening next season,
00:23:10
i'm i'm home for like a total of eight days for part of that i'm doing a little
00:23:16
bit of traveling going for work and going to go see a conference.
00:23:19
But I'm excited for all the great guests that are coming on.
00:23:25
We have Heather's coming on and we have.
00:23:29
Susan coming on and we have so much to tell them, everybody.
00:23:33
Yeah, because I can't remember because there's still so many.
00:23:37
But we have a bunch of stuff going on with the PR firm and new stuff coming
00:23:44
out for the newsletter, working on some new merch.
00:23:47
We're getting a new vendor for the merch. So I'm super excited about that.
00:23:52
And what about you, Gary Skittles? I mean, I honestly, I'm just excited to meet
00:23:59
new people and hear their stories and see what other lessons I can selfishly learn from.
00:24:07
So I'm excited.
00:24:09
I'm excited just to even catch up with you. Yeah, me too.
00:24:13
And, you know, if there's somebody that you, that our listeners really want
00:24:18
to have on the podcast, let us know.
00:24:20
You can go out to our website. We need to bring Candy back. Oh, Candy's coming back.
00:24:24
And he's coming back in November for sure. And Jack and Brad? Jack and Brad.
00:24:30
Honey Badger's coming back. And we just have some incredible content coming
00:24:36
out over the next couple of months.
00:24:39
People that have overcome some really, really hard stuff and have come out on
00:24:44
the other side happier than they've ever been.
00:24:47
And so I'm super excited about that.
00:24:50
Maybe we'll get Crazy 8 to come back and talk about his journey since we last spoke.
00:24:56
I would love that because he is one of the most requested guests that we have
00:25:00
that's asked to come back.
00:25:03
Well, he's definitely gone through some shit, y'all. We'll see if he'll,
00:25:06
how he, if he's ready, I guess I should say.
00:25:09
But you should follow him on Instagram because he's now making cutting boards
00:25:15
and cheese boards and they are freaking amazing. All handmade.
00:25:20
I'll put his Instagram logo. Purple Heart Groove.
00:25:24
Purple Heart Groove. In the show notes so that you can go follow him on Instagram.
00:25:30
Yep, that's my pops. Just be nice. Just be nice. Please.
00:25:34
Hi, all. Thank you so much for listening to this episode. I'm G-Rex. And I'm Dirty Skittles.
00:25:40
Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review this podcast. We'd love to listen
00:25:44
to your feedback. We can't do this without you guys.
00:25:48
It's okay to be not okay. Just make sure you're talking to someone.
00:25:52
Music.
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