Alexis Kur: You Are Not Your Diagnosis — Redefining Mental Health
Sh!t That Goes On In Our HeadsOctober 13, 2026
5
00:50:4846.52 MB

Alexis Kur: You Are Not Your Diagnosis — Redefining Mental Health

Alexis Kur joins G-Rex and Dirty Skittles to share her journey living with Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), breaking mental health stigma, navigating trauma therapy, and reclaiming her identity beyond a diagnosis. Through honest conversations about mental health advocacy, personal boundaries, and redefining success, Alexis reminds us that healing begins when we stop letting others define who we are.

Who gets to define who you are? Your diagnosis, your past, or someone else's expectations? In this hilariously honest and deeply meaningful episode, G-Rex and Dirty Skittles sit down with Alexis Kur, a special education teacher, mental health advocate, and founder of Permission to Define, to talk about living with Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), challenging mental health stereotypes, finding the right therapist, setting boundaries, and taking back the power to define yourself.

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Sh!t That Goes On In Our Heads is a 2024 People’s Choice Podcast Award Winner (Best Health), 2024 Women in Podcasting Award Winner (Best Mental Health Podcast), 2026 Podcast Tonight Award Winner (Best Mental Health Podcast), and 2026 NYC Podcast Award Audience Choice Winner (Best Hosts), with over 4.5 million downloads and listened to in over 160 countries.

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Mental Health Quote

"The hardest lesson I've ever learned is disclosure is not access." — Alexis Kur

Content Notice & Mental Health Crisis Resources

This episode includes conversations about Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), trauma, mental health stigma, difficult therapeutic experiences, discrimination related to a mental health diagnosis, and a brief mention of a past suicide attempt. Please listen with care and take breaks if needed.

If you or someone you know is experiencing a mental health crisis in the United States, call or text 988 or visit:
https://988lifeline.org/

For crisis resources outside the United States:
https://findahelpline.com/

Episode Description

What if everything you've been told about your mental health, your identity, and what success should look like isn't the whole story?

In this powerful, funny, and unapologetically honest episode, Alexis Kur joins G-Rex and Dirty Skittles to talk about living with Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), challenging mental health stigma, and refusing to let anyone else define who you are.

Diagnosed with DID at 26, Alexis opens up about navigating nearly two decades of therapy, confronting misconceptions about her diagnosis, and building a trusted team of three therapists she affectionately calls her "Justice League." From equine-assisted therapy to exploring EMDR, she shares why finding the right mental health support matters and why healing sometimes requires questioning the language and expectations surrounding it.

Alexis also shares the remarkable career change that took her from a successful, six-figure environmental consulting career to teaching high school special education. For her, success is no longer measured by money or professional recognition. It's watching a struggling student find the confidence to walk into class or discover a strength nobody else noticed.

Things get especially real when Alexis discusses having her diagnosis used against her by someone she trusted professionally. That painful experience reinforced one of her most important lessons: Disclosure is not access. Sharing your story doesn't give someone permission to weaponize it.

Through laughter, vulnerability, and plenty of colorful language, Alexis reminds us that lived experience matters, boundaries are essential, and only you get to decide what your diagnosis or your life means.

Because sometimes the most powerful thing you can do for your mental health is stop trying to fit someone else's definition of normal.

Keywords: Alexis Kur, Permission to Define, Dissociative Identity Disorder, DID awareness, living with DID, mental health stigma, mental health advocacy, trauma therapy, EMDR therapy, equine-assisted therapy, therapy relationships, mental health boundaries, self-advocacy, redefining success, lived experience

Meet Our Guest — Alexis Kur

Alexis Kur is a high school special education teacher, mental health advocate, speaker, writer, and founder of Permission to Define, a platform dedicated to challenging labels, amplifying lived experiences, and changing conversations about mental health.

After 15 years in environmental consulting, Alexis traded a six-figure salary for something far more meaningful: helping teenagers recognize their strengths, build confidence, and believe in themselves. Now, working with high school students who receive special education services for emotional impairments, she brings compassion, authenticity, and her lived experience into the classroom.

Diagnosed with Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) at 26, Alexis has spent nearly two decades navigating therapy, confronting mental health stereotypes, and discovering what it means to live authentically. Through Permission to Define, she champions the value of lived experience, challenges limiting language, and encourages others to take ownership of how they define themselves.

With sharp humor, unapologetic honesty, and a refreshing willingness to question the status quo, Alexis reminds us that a diagnosis is information, not an identity, and that everyone deserves the freedom to tell their own story.

Connect with Alexis:

Key Takeaways

  • Your diagnosis doesn't define your identity. Alexis challenges misconceptions about Dissociative Identity Disorder and reminds us that a diagnosis may help explain someone's experiences, but it never tells their entire story.
  • Disclosure is not access. Sharing personal mental health information doesn't give anyone permission to weaponize that information, cross your boundaries, or demand access to parts of your life you've chosen to keep private.
  • Finding the right therapist can change your mental health journey. Alexis's trusted "Justice League" of three therapists demonstrates how collaboration, respect, and a strong therapeutic relationship can make difficult emotional work feel more manageable.
  • Success is about purpose, not just a paycheck. Leaving a lucrative environmental consulting career helped Alexis realize that watching a student overcome a challenge can be more rewarding than professional status or financial success.
  • Lived experience deserves a voice in mental health conversations. Alexis uses her experiences with DID and therapy to help educators, mental health professionals, and others better understand the perspectives of people living with mental health conditions.
  • You have permission to challenge the language of healing. Whether she's questioning the word "resilient" or pushing back against scripted therapy phrases, Alexis reminds us that we can choose words and definitions that genuinely reflect our experiences.

Actionable Items

  • Redefine a label you've been carrying. Choose one word others have used to describe you, such as anxious, difficult, or resilient, and consider whether it reflects who you are or whether it's time to create your own definition.
  • Practice setting boundaries around personal disclosure. Before sharing something about your mental health, decide what you're comfortable revealing and remind yourself that being honest doesn't mean giving someone unlimited access to your personal experiences.
  • Evaluate whether your support system respects your needs. Think about whether the people supporting your mental health listen without judgment, respect your boundaries, and encourage you to participate in decisions about your well-being.

Important Chapters

  • 00:00:37 — Meet Alexis Kur: Mental Health Advocate and Educator
  • 00:01:22 — Overcommitting, Perfectionism, and Mental Health
  • 00:04:29 — Living With DID and the Art of Multitasking
  • 00:07:54 — Finding Balance and Learning to Protect Your Time
  • 00:11:30 — Leaving a Six-Figure Career to Redefine Success
  • 00:14:13 — Building Trust With Special Education Students
  • 00:19:45 — How Lived Experience Shapes Alexis's Teaching
  • 00:23:05 — Receiving a Dissociative Identity Disorder Diagnosis
  • 00:24:27 — The Therapy Justice League: EMDR and Equine-Assisted Therapy
  • 00:27:24 — Why Alexis Challenges Traditional Therapy Language
  • 00:30:01 — Finding the Right Therapist and Building Trust
  • 00:33:19 — Overcoming Fear Through Equine-Assisted Therapy
  • 00:37:05 — Why Therapy Is Hard Work
  • 00:37:51 — Creating Permission to Define
  • 00:39:32 — Living Authentically Beyond Mental Health Labels
  • 00:42:48 — Advice to Her Younger Self: Finding Your People
  • 00:43:34 — Disclosure Is Not Access: Learning Difficult Boundaries
  • 00:44:56 — Mental Health Advice That Misses the Mark
  • 00:46:13 — Anxiety Theme Songs, Humor, and the Power of Words
  • 00:49:02 — Connecting With Alexis and Permission to Define
  • 00:49:54 — Closing Thoughts and Mental Health Reminder

Closing CTA

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#MentalHealthPodcast #MentalHealthAwareness #Grex #DirtySkittles #Podmatch #AlexisKur #PermissionToDefine #DissociativeIdentityDisorder #DIDAwareness #MentalHealthStigma #MentalHealthAdvocacy #TraumaHealing #TherapyJourney #MentalHealthBoundaries #SelfAdvocacy #LivedExperienceMatters #RedefiningSuccess #AuthenticLiving #SpecialEducation #YouAreNotYourDiagnosis

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